Was awfully hard to decide. I resolved not to give in any more but I’m afraid I wouldn’t have been so strong if it would have actually come to tell him so. Fortunately I was preserved from that. It wasn’t too early when I rang him up and the line was occupied. Later my call wasn’t answered. Same…

At home today. Spoke with Leon several times today. Once (?) he was awfully sweet, the kids, his brother’s children seemed to be at his office. It was quite fun to catch him unaware like this. Promised to tell him about my decision early next morning.

I was at a late mass today but didn’t meet Mrs Farkasvölgyi there. Went to the cemetery early in the afternoon. ? has just looked out of his window when I passed but Magdi was not in yet. Mother + little Ervin came, we left together but I left them on the way as she stopped to talk to a friend. The…

 Things seem to get every more serious. If I would be a man I would have to report at once it seems for military service. I wish I would be a man. Vin’s influence seem to have lasted in such degree, that although I meant to ring up Leon after office hours when he phoned me earlier I didn’t recognize…

Yesterday’s cooking took ages. It was 9.10 when I left. Too awful. Bözsi absent. – Today Vin. phoned me, we made an appointment for the evening. I got rather nervous about the whole thing stage fright I suppose and would have liked to bolt (?) in the end, didn’t want to meet him. So I went to the…

There was quite a lot to do all day. I went to the gymn classes in the evening. The place where R. Margit moved to is rather far near my old school. It is rather ? Emmy fell over my neck. I was welcomed most warmly. At last a place where I’m appreciated. I heared all sorts of rumours which make me…

Had a long talk after mass with Leon according to which we made a rather ambiguous appointment which naturally didn’t come off. I was about 40 minutes late so I’m not sure if it was not my fault he might have had the same of waiting, if it mattered him, however. It quite spoilt my evening and even…

We had an appointment with Leon at the same place as last. He was unusually punctual. It was quite alright. We were sitting at the banks of the river and had a most informal party. Had a little chat over a few moral and religious questions what we didn’t exactly agree. How could we. It is nearly…

This morning Leon rang me up we made an appointment for the evening which I couldn’t keep however as cooking took ages. I rang him up at night and we had an awfully long talk. At noon I spoke with Vin. on the phone, on account of Mother who wasn’t mind seeing him. He is exactly the same, talks for…

Nasty weather today. Had another talk on the phone with Leon last night. This morning he rang me up. In the evening I meant to go to cinema, but talked it over with him. Sheer madness and even more. It must be definitely stopped especially as he thinks that marriage is a great ….. (empty space) In…