The whole week passed in a whirl. Went to the Sophianeum on retreat. It was the best I had since the first with F. Bíró. Stayed in for the whole time on the third day only. Marietta, her goddaughter Miry (?) I + the christened Jewess were in the same company. We kept together. This young woman, the conversed one, was rather hurt on the last day by a slighting remark on Jews. We tried to comfort her and told her at the same time to expect slights like that + even worse on every possible occasion. On the whole she was nice and might be thinking about conversion seriously, though I’m sure without these caressing (???) circumstances she would never have thought of it. Of course her whole mentality couldn’t change so suddenly so she does say unexpected things at times. I wonder if Marietta has the same experience. Doesn’t matter anyway. Asked the Father (Kardos) opinion too on my problem of Jewish marriage. He told me he didn’t think I really loved the man it was rather a trick of biological instincts (or something like he didn’t say it exactly so), we shouldn’t meet for a longer time at least until about Easter. Told him his birthday comes earlier, so he said I’ll see by then. I should ask the Lord to send me some other partner for life, he didn’t think this would be a fortunate solution. Should ask for particular protection of the Holy Virgin too. Anyway if I wouldn’t marry that wouldn’t be such a great thing as remaining single had quite a great deal more of a (…….) (empty space) connected with it. Never thought of that. But otherwise then I thought exactly about the same question and in the same way even to this last I mentioned to him, so it is good to see that I struck on the right path. On Friday evening I was so happy that I never felt like that before. Would have happily died at the time. Can’t quite explain what it was like, I was simply bursting with it. Makes one feel strong that such feelings exist and in a comparatively bad time. After all from a human + realistic point of view I really wasn’t in the worst (?) of circumstances. With parents elderly, if not old, and in not of the best health; in as world of insecure as ever; being let down by one man, though according to my wishes, still being hurt by it, having to give up the other and having such remorse on his account, in a not too youthful age, with no prospects as they say, do I won’t admit latter as one has as many prospects as one chooses. Anyway I don’t think I had much to be happy about if I would have classes to be pessimistic, and still I was, as I already described, buoyantly happy. So it doesn’t depend on circumstances. – Had my photo taken too and they are ready. Two are good. Marietta chose on of the bad ones, a smiling pose. – No news from England. Sent Auntie R. none photo as one given to Marietta.