Was mad enough to ring up Leon. I’m convinced that if I wouldn’t have made this he wouldn’t have had the idea. Was mad enough to meet him. I hate myself for it all and am thoroughly disgusted. This must stop. I have an idea that this was our last meeting under such certain stances. This all has no sense whatever. What can he mean. What is his idea. I’ll much rather confluently keep away than to be obliged to keep it all dark. Awful.