I was most shocked. In spite of my hearty reassurances that I won’t go to Martha’s this afternoon Mother promised her that I would, when she phoned. The kids were rather bad and though M. returned early I came home late again. I nearly had a quarrel with Martha over different questions. If things go wrong it will be entirely her own fault. She can’t bring up her children properly and then worries that they are naughty + would like to get rid of the consequences; she can’t handle her husband, poor man deserves a better treatment & then she’ll wonder that there is no peace + order in her home. The trouble is she doesn’t want a shop but would like to live without work and care follow the example of her rich friends. I’m not the least satisfied with her. I do hope if ever I do marry I won’t be the least like her. After all marriage is a whole time job.

Even if I’ll do my utmost to preserve and to (empty place) my personality I’ll do my best to be a good wife + mother and be myself and make my home as haven of peace and if possible comfort. My own person + the atmosphere which surrounds me should be a refuge from all the worries of career + everyday life my people should find peace + contentment + love in my company. – Shouldn’t Vin. be delighted. But I’m afraid he has not only a high opinion of me. At least he has no reason to have it. – I ‘phoned Vin. this afternoon wanted to persuade him to take part at the Midnight Adoration on the 27^th + to go to confession beforehand. He already resolved former, but I’m sure he’ll do the other too so (inkblot on the paper) off my mind and a great loud (?) too.