Snow + snow all the day. Lovely time for Vincent’s skiing. God bless him, the dear. I tried to persuade Mother that to learn it is utterly necessary for me. I ought to learn till I’m young and have time. Comparatively. –

Irene came rather late. The film was quite a good one. We met Ervin + co. coming out. Mrs Áron asked me to join them next time. She is quite alright, though I don’t agree with her views in some questions. I might enjoy their company.

(kép forrása: Fortepan #29597; adományozó: Kölcsey Ferenc Dunakeszi Városi Könyvtár, Petanovits fényképek)

I was mad to believe I ever meant anything to that man. I suppose I should be glad that I don’t. Of course he didn’t ring me up. Someone ‘phoned at ten when I was out, I thought it might have been him. To make sure I rang him up. He was busy at the time. No he knew he should have ‘phoned me it was among the notes. So that is that. I hate him + everyone myself included. I was mad ever to have thought of him. All this I deserve. If someone is mad enough to let herself be hurt it serves her right if they make use of it. What should I do now is to put him out of my mind altogether. Not only not to ring him up ever again but to refuse to get in touch with him in any way if ever he should make advances again. I must resolve + I will be strong. But how can I do it.

Went to the H. Clinic in the worst mood possible. I think I could have cried there and then if I wouldn’t have been afraid of a red nose, and explanations. Vince was a dear like he used to be. Tried to make me sociable with little success. Little did he guess I’m sure that while I tried to smile + talk nothing was farther in my thoughts than he and everything that was actually around me. He made excuses for never coming near us which was really quite unnecessary. I don’t care for him any longer. And I won’t let myself be hurt by anyone in future. I wish I was a thousand miles from here. I daren’t say I wish I was dead, It might be worse.

- The gym class was simply lovely. There were only the two of us, Marika + I. It was so exhilirating [exhilarating]. I learnt to make sommersaults [somersaults]. (At my reverut age, who’d think it, I must be truly mad some would say). I think next time I feel upset about anything, especially men, I’ll try a sommersault or two and stand on my hands. Nothing like seeing things upside down, when they get complicated. Knocks them in their own shape, I suppose.

Church again, first Friday. I arranged to wait for Leo’s phone call tomorrow morning.

Late for church again had to wait for another mass, was quite frozen by the end. Martha + family here. I’ve chillblains, they’re so tiresome. Will have to ring that awful person up. Don’t like it at all it is his turn, he didn’t answer our invitation of yesterday. I’m afraid he is giving himself airs. Rudeness impersonificated I wonder.

Irene called. Nothing of L. so far. I’ll keep strong. – Martha dropped in, we had a good laugh. – Before going out suddenly couldn’t resist the temptation of ringing L<eo?> up + asking if he was the one who tried to find me. He wasn’t. But our little talk quite put me out again. Serves me right to not having kept my resolution. I’m quite mad about him, I’m afraid. Too bad. – The party was a great success. Vali’s brother is a perfect dear, I like him + apparently he likes me. Répássy <?> had a nervous breakdown, poor fellow and was still in a sort of melancholic mood. Needs a good bracing. Was rather sorry I couldn’t make him feel wanted + cheer him up on the whole, but he was sitting at the other end of the table by Vali. Besides one really shouldn’t book all the men even if one is considered a born flirt. Or is it acquisition with me, I wonder. I’d rather take it for misunderstanding. All I want is to make people like me and to make them feel liked. – Something must be wrong with me. The ticket collectors on buses consequently ignore me. This is the third time I held the fare in my hand all the way + it wasn’t collected.

Someone rang me up while out. I suppose it was L. I’ll be strong + not try to get him on the line. – Spoke with Vali, just going out for a walk with her brother. Half promised to meet them at the Spolarich at night. But didn’t eventually. Was in the Bank, bought few things. – At the gym. class there were only two of us with Marika. Enjoyed it.

(kép forrása: Magyar Kereskedelmi és Vendéglátóipari Múzeum, https://hu.museum-digital.org/index.php?t=objekt&oges=16712)

Vali called unexpectedly. She has a rather charming brother. Looks a good sport + very fit in spite of having one arm only. War. – Spoke with Marietta, she, full of trouble. Wrote those two men, the Dr + our rhapsodic cavalier, that was.

Nearly late for church again. Theatre in the afternoon. Saw some good dresses and a snug riding suit.

Lovely day. Good start for the year. Been in the cemetery + cinema later. Someone pulled out the phone plug, noone could ring us up to wish a happy N. Y. Spoke with Miki about tickets for the Opera. Captain T. +sons called.

A blog egy családi hagyatékban fennmaradt kéziratos napló átirata. A blog szerzője 1908-ban született, a naplóját vélhetően a családja előtti titkosítás és/vagy a nyelvgyakorlás szándékával írta angolul. 

A blog fejlécében látható fotó a naplóíró családjáról készült fotó részlete. Itt a teljes kép látható. A felső sorban, balról jobbra Pajkr Nóra, Pajkr Ervin, Pajkr Márta és a férje Korpás Gyula, Pajkr Hildegárd - a napló írója. Az alsó sorban a szülők: Stefanek Mária és Pajkr József.

Hildegárd 1908. október 20-án, Budapesten született. Szülei Csehországból származó osztrák állampolgárok voltak. Az 1870-ben Vlkava-ban született Pajkr József (szülei: Jozef Pajkr és Barbara Prokes) és a szintén 1870-ben született, Přelouč-ból származó Stefanek Mária (szülei: Franz Stefanek/Stepanek  és Maria Prokop) 1895-ben kötöttek házasságot Budapesten a Józsefvárosban. 

Öt gyermeket neveltek fel: Márta Jozefát (sz. 1896. május 1.), Eleonóra Terézia Hildegárdot (sz. 1902. december 5., aki 1838-ban halt meg) Ervin József Ferencet (sz. 1904. november 21.), Hildegárd Mária Erzsébetet (1908. október 20.) és a kisgyermekként elhunyt Emília Mária Magdolna (1912. június 4.). 1898-ban született Edit Mária nevű lányuk még ugyanabban az évben elhunyt.

A családnak cukrászati papírkellékeket gyártó üzeme volt a Thököly út 111. szám alatt (József, eredeti szakmáját tekintve, könyvkötő volt).

Hildegárd a Hungária úti elemi után a Szemere utcai Ráskay Lea leánygimnáziumban érettségizett, de az érettségi előtt egy ideig az Országos Gyermekvédő Liga és az angol "Famine Area Childrens Hospitality Comittee" szervezésében az angliai Bridgewater College House Schoolban tanult. 1926/27-ben a Budapesti Kereskedelmi Akadémián egyéves kereskedelmi szaktanfolyamot végzett, angolból felsőfokú, franciából és németből középfokú nyelvvizsgája volt. Angol irodalmat és nyelvet tanult a Univ. College of the South West of England/Exeter-en.

Előbb háztartási alkalmazottként dolgozott, majd szülei gyárában az általános adminisztratív munkát végezte (1956-ig). Ezt követően előbb a Metalimpex majd a Terimpex külkereskedelmi levelezője lett.

Egyedül élt, nem volt gyermeke, 1990-ben halt meg.

A naplóban természetszerűleg rajtuk kívül sok más személy felbukkan, akik többsége sajnos ismeretlen számomra; a sikeresen azonosított személyeket minden esetre igyekszem bemutatni.

A naplót az eredeti nyelven és az eredeti szöveget a lehető leghűségesebb módon adom közre, de a könnyebb használhatóság miatt kulcsszavazom és ahol lehetőség kínálkozik, ott az eseményekre, helyekre, személyekre vonatkozóan linkeket is beillesztek.